一个篇幅不长不短的英语幽默故事最好有一些哲理万分感谢
不能太难 最好能多几篇
Roaming Charges
At the grocery store, I couldn't understand why free-range eggs were more expensive than ordinary eggs. “Well, sir, think of it as being like your cell phone,” explained the checkout clerk. “They get you with roaming charges.”
漫游费
在杂货店里，我不懂为什么草鸡蛋比普通鸡蛋要贵。收银员解释说：“嗯，先生，你拿它比作你的手机来想。漫游是要加钱的。”
It's three o'clock 那是三点钟
My wife has always been impressed by my ability to identify bird species solely by its song. To help her learn a little bit about birds, I bought a novelty kitchen clock that sounds a different bird call for each hour. We were relaxing in our yard when a cardinal started singing. “What's that?” I challenged. She listened closely. “It's three o'clock.”
那是三点钟
我太太对于我光听鸟的叫声就能说出是哪一种鸟的本领非常佩服。为了帮助她学习有关鸟的知识，我买了一台小巧玲珑的厨房钟。它每个小时能发出不同的鸟叫声。我们正在院子里休息的时候，一只红雀开始唱歌。我考考我太太：“那是什么鸟？”她仔细听了一会儿说：“那是三点钟。”
Still Half Glass of Water
During his speech at my graduation, Bill Cosby was making the point that true wisdom comes not from a classroom but from life. When he was in college, he said, his class endlessly discussed the question: Is the glass half full or half empty? So Cosby asked his grandmother the same question. She had it all figured out: “Depends on whether you're pouring or drinking.”
还是半杯水
（著名黑人喜剧演员）比尔·考斯比在我们毕业典礼上发表演说。他的观点是，真正的智慧不是来自课堂，而是来自生活。他说，在他上大学的时候，他们班上没完没了地讨论一个问题：玻璃杯里是一半满还是一半空。于是他就拿这个问题去问他的奶奶。他的奶奶把这个问题讲得很透彻：“这要看你是添水还是喝水。”
You first
After I saw a mouse scurrying across my kitchen, I set out some poison and went to bed. But I didn't realize I left a half-finished cup of yogurt on the counter. The next morning when I went to toss it away, I noticed that tucked in the yogurt were two of the pellets I'd left for Mr. Mouse. I had to smile. It was like he was saying, “You first.”
您先请
看见一只老鼠在厨房里蹿过去，我下了一些耗子药，就去睡了。但是我忘了厨台上还放了一杯喝了一半的酸奶。第二天早上，当我去扔酸奶的时候，发现里面有两颗我为老鼠先生准备的小药丸。我苦笑了一下。这好像是它在对我说：“您先请。”
，，，，，，，O(∩_∩)O~